Are you one of the millions of moms raising a neurodivergent child?
How about a child with ADHD, Autism, sensory processing disorder, or a learning disability?
Let me ask this:
Do you believe that our children are all unique?
Because I’ve noticed that as a culture, we say we embrace the uniqueness of every child, but the way we approach kids tells a different story.
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Lies We Believe When Raising a Neurodiverse Kid
There’s this idea out there that tells us something is wrong with our kids if they don’t fit into the box of the world’s expectations.
And of course, for many of us, that idea then spirals into this one.
“I am a bad mom because my kid doesn’t fall in line.”
This is not good for anyone, Friend.
What is neurodiversity?
Let’s back up a bit. What exactly do I mean by neurodiversity?
According to Understood.org,
Neurodiversity is a viewpoint that brain differences are normal, rather than deficits. The idea of neurodiversity can have benefits for kids with learning and thinking differences. This concept can help reduce stigma around learning and thinking differences.
For all intents and purposes, I’m including kids with:
- ADHD,
- Autism,
- Sensory Processing Disorder or related issues,
- Anxiety,
- Learning Differences
- Adoption, trauma, etc…
Do We Really Celebrate Diversity?
Here is the deal. We say we celebrate diversity, but then we shame those who don’t fall in line. The kids who:
- act differently,
- say the “wrong” thing,
- look differently because they wear the wrong clothes,
- like the “wrong” things…
For the sake of our kids’ futures, this has to stop. Don’t you think?
Christian Moms Need to Examine Beliefs
Perhaps, our kids were never meant to “fall in line”?
If you’re a Christian mom raising a uniquely wired kid, you may struggle with this belief.
Many of us have been told by our church culture that behavior A, B, & C are appropriate. Then we are told that Behaviors X, Y and Z are inappropriate.
The next message is loud and clear.
It’s our job to control our kids’ behaviors based on these rules.
But what happens when our kids do things differently? What about when they don’t respond and fall in line?
We often panic and push harder with the same old parenting strategies that DO NOT work.
Moms of ADHD & Autism Need To Think Differently
Maybe you are the momma who watches her child break down with anxiety when it’s “homework” time.
Or are you the mom who has been “kicked out” of playgroup because your child doesn’t know how to “behave” appropriately?
Sleepless Nights?
Perhaps you’re like so many moms who wake at 2:00 am overwhelmed and gripped with fear.
You know your child is struggling but you don’t know what to do. Your mind races about what you should do to support your child.
Everything the “experts” tell you only causes angst, pain, and a broken relationship between you and your child.
Meltdowns Pushing You to Your Limit?
Free 5-Day Parenting Devotional for Relief & Tools That Work!
Sensory Meltdowns Are Not Bad Behavior
Maybe you’re the mom who’s late to church because your kid had a meltdown in the parking lot. That tag on her new pair of pants is driving her INSANE.
You try to create cohesion in between your kids. However, one child screams bloody murder because his sister won’t stop singing.
Your child is overwhelmed and needs you to stop and love them through it. Unfortunately, all eyes are on you telling you to nip it in the bud.
Shame. So destructive.
Are you over it?
You may be over listening to those who advise you to continue pushing, disciplining and punishing for “bad behavior.”
- That you aren’t praying hard enough.
- You are too lenient.
- Your child is manipulating you and has to learn sometime.
Have these approaches been successful? I’m going to take a guess that it’s not going well.
Meltdowns Pushing You to Your Limit?
Free 5-Day Parenting Devotional for Relief & Tools That Work!
Neurodiverse Kids Need Us to Believe in Them
What would happen if we moms came together and started to think outside-the-box for our neurodiverse kids?
What if we approach our exhausted and “out-of-control” kid with a co-regulating hug rather than the acceptable time-out?
And imagine if a mom in another aisle of the store hears and comes over to pat you on the back?
Collectively mothers can fight against the unhealthy desire to people please and change the narrative for neurodiverse kids.
They too, have been fearfully and wonderfully made.
Ignore The Haters
And when the naysayers call us helicopter parents, we confidently hold our heads high knowing we’re doing the best we can to meet the needs of our own unique kids.
Together, we can embrace our kids’ unique-wiring and allow our kids to be who they are.
Moms sharing a vision of a bright and thriving future for each of our unique children.
Change the Narrative of ADHD, Autism & Anxiety
Let’s change the narrative for our outside-the-box thinkers. For our kids with:
- ADHD
- Autism
- Sensory Processing Issues
- Learning Differences
- Anxiety…
Or for the kids who may not have a diagnosis:
- The child who says, “I don’t know” all the time…
- Or the one who can’t stop moving, talking or is impulsive,
- The kid whose room is always a mess,
- Here is a BIG one… the child who won’t obey no matter what…
Is the traditional approach working?
It’s time for us moms to come together and change the narrative for our outside-the-box kids.
There is a better way. I think we can.
In fact, I know we can because we are already doing it. We would love to have you join us.
Meltdowns Pushing You to Your Limit?
Free 5-Day Parenting Devotional for Relief & Tools That Work!
Raising ADHD & Autistic Kids with a New Lens
When we shift our thinking, we then will be able to equip our kids with what they need.
We mommas can then give them the support, encouragement and tools they need to use those perceived weaknesses as the strengths that they really are.
No more kids growing up with self-worth that tells them they will never be good enough so why bother.
Every child has been blessed by God with gifts, passions and purpose.
Let’s begin to parent them this way, Mommas.
We are in this together equipping our neurodiverse kids to thrive.
Tina’s Story
P.S Check out my friend Tina’s story
My dear friend, Tina, has been living out this momma growth mindset with her teen daughter.
Tina’s daughter was diagnosed with Selective Mutism, just one of many forms of childhood anxiety, at the age of 12.
In this post, Tina’s daughter shares her story navigating her experience with Selective Mutism.
She offers 5 tips to support anxious kids.
Be encouraged!
Meltdowns Pushing You to Your Limit?
Free 5-Day Parenting Devotional for Relief & Tools That Work!
This post may contain affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, I may earn a nominal fee from qualifying purchases. Thank you for your support. See my disclosure policy for more info.
And, yes, it’s true.
God did pick just the right parents for these kids.
And the right kid for the right parent.
A stranger or a community member can tell this.
Yes!! Love the right kid for the right parent. I learn so much from my kids. Grateful to God for them. 🙂
That is one of my favorite quotes!
“..if you judge a fish by his ability to climb a tree he will live his entire life thinking he is stupid..”
Says so much in so few words 💕
I watched my little guy go from defeated to almost too confident
because I was learning about his differences and therefore validating his feelings and emotions.. he felt heard and understood. Then we were able to work on strengths. Now he thinks he is a genius 😘
Such a good quote, right? So happy to know of your sweet boy’s newfound belief in who he is because of how He created him. Love!!
Sharing! Great to raise awareness and the fact that no-one has to struggle on alone, there is help available!
Thank you so much, Sharon. So important to love our kids where they are at and support them as we can. Appreciate your encouragement.
Great post! I have 2 children with ADHD and this was very encouraging. Thanks!
Thank you, Mary. Love these outside-the-box kids so much!