Special Needs Holiday Stress: 15 Tips For 2020

Special Needs Holiday Stress: 15 Tips For 2020

Special Needs Holiday Stress 

The holidays are coming!  Yay!  And that means it’s time to preemptively strike the Special Needs family holiday stress.  

After the past year, it’s about time for us to simply enjoy the holidays.  We need the joy that comes from tradition, visiting family, pumpkin pies, gift-giving, and turning our eyes back to what matters most. 

The Wonderful Can Be Stressful

However,  this season can also lead to extra stress for the exact same reasons that can make it wonderful.   

When you’re a mom raising kids with ADHD, Autism or other executive functioning issues, the holiday hustle and bustle take stress to a whole new level. 

We’re talkin special needs holiday stress.  

How Do I Stay Stress Free Through The Holidays?

You don’t. 

So while we special needs moms can’t avoid all of the holiday stressors, there are certainly ways that we can limit them. 

The holiday time is sacred for so many of us.  It’s supposed to be a time of respite and reflection.

This means that we each must set up guardrails around the holidays based on our specific family’s needs. 

Even if it disappoints Aunt Edna.  Who is this Aunt Edna that I always speak of, BTW?    

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How To Beat The Holiday Stress?  Ask A Tribe Of Special Needs Moms

And because we’re in this together, I’ve circled back to the mom experts from AHFAS private community for some help. 

Yes, Friend.  Today, we’re easing the pressure of the holidays with some stress management tips from some special needs moms.     

Why are the holidays so stressful?

So why are the holidays so stinkin stressful?  And why is it even more challenging when you’re a mom navigating a family full of ADHD brains, for example?   

Ok.  Doesn’t that last question speak for itself?  Seriously.

What Causes Stress During The Holidays?

Let’s talk about the chaos of the holidays.  For a special needs mom this means:

 

  • Loss of Routine,
  • Over-stimulation,
  • Big personalities who don’t know how (or care) to “read the room”,
  • Junk food,
  • Late nights,
  • Social misfires and traffic jams,
  • and on and on and on…
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Special Needs Moms Rallying Together To Beat Holiday Stress

Now we’ve stated the obvious. The holidays are coming and with them will be extra stress.  So now let’s take some proactive steps so we can savor the season.

Let’s start with Melanie, shall we?  I mean, she has a PhD in math!  And even better, she’s been a commited member of our mom tribe since the beginning.  She knows what it’s like to deal with the messy of motherhood.

Let’s see what she has to say.

Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #1- KISS & Tacos?  

KISS. Keep it simple sally!

Sometimes less is more.  Talk with your spouse and together decide what is really important.

I don’t stress about making a huge meal.  We actually have tacos on Thanksgiving and love it.

I encourage (as much as I possibly can) fewer gifts. In fact we don’t give any gifts to our children because we don’t want to add more on top of what family already gives.

More gifts = more mess = more frustration!!  

-Melanie, themathprofs.com

Erika Spence, adoptive mom, agrees with Melanie’s heartbeat for simplicity.

Keep it simple. One or two gifts, not a lot of events or parties. 

In our home, the rule is one gift and simple stocking stuffers.

Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #2: Do Your Own Thing Guilt-Free

I love what Erica had to say because it speaks to the freedom we all need to live in as moms.

We must prioritize our own family needs and let go of the guilt.

She told us this:

What I would say is think outside the box.  The holidays don’t have to be spent exactly like everyone else. 

We don’t all have to rearrange the house and put up trees and spend a fortune on things.  If you and your family absolutely love those things and it brings joy, do it.  Not your thing?  Then don’t!

No need to feel any kind of guilt either way.   My extended family thought I was a little nuts when I started thinking outside the box about holidays.

Our kiddos say they like it the way it is and wouldn’t go back.   Don’t be afraid to try out some new traditions that fit your family.  It could be the best thing ever.

 -Erica, Mom of two (one with dyslexia, anxiety & sensory processing issues)

Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #3: Bring Your Own Food (Even If People Think You’re Weird)

I have my child on a strict no gluten, no dairy diet.  So I just bring plenty of approved treats.  I bring enough to share of course.  And I act like it’s no big thing. 

-Maggie (1 child with moderate non-verbal ASD)  Maggie’s Fresh Kitchen

Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #4: Think like a Boy Scout

Be like a boy scout and be prepared! Think ahead and try to get in front of as many possible situations as you can. The more prepared you are, the more calm you are likely to remain when something inevitably goes wrong. 

-Amy, Mom of 4 (Cerebral Palsy, ADHD, Anxiety, SPD), Real Talk with Amy

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Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #5: Noise Cancelling Headphones

I learned the hard way to always ALWAYS double check the itineraries of town festivities.   As well as to always travel with noise cancelling headphones.

Apparently, Alicia learned this lesson the hard way twice.

Once was during a tree lighting ceremony in a new town we had just moved to.  The other time was when my boy was four and we took him to the beach. 

Both places, fireworks went off and we had ZERO clue it was part of the evening’s agenda. 

My oldest was a sensory avoider and a RUNNER.   We almost lost him both times as he ran into the crowd. What made it worse is that he was non-verbal!

He was only a few feet in front of us when, at the sound of fireworks, his fight-flight mode took over.  

Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #6: Prepare For Fight-Or-Flight 

When we finally found him, he was banging on business doors to desperate to escape the noise.  

I held him inside my winter coat and ran as far as I could to get away.  It didn’t help the sound was bouncing off all the downtown buildings.  He and I both cried through it, but we made it.

He is 15 now and verbal.  He can handle and enjoys fireworks!  

However, we now always travel with noise cancelling headphones and double check the itinerary!  

 – Alicia, Mom of 3 boys (2 biological and 1 adopted through the foster care system);  ASD, SPD, RAD, Microcephaly, Mood Disorder, Shaken Baby Syndrome)

Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #7: One Thing A Day, Predictability, & Pre-Teach

My holiday hacks is specific to my SPD kiddo.  It’s simple, but it works.

We only plan ONE THING A DAY. JUST ONE. 

However, we break our own rule on Christmas Eve but plan nothing the day before or after to cushion the overstimulation.   

My husband and I always explain the plan in advance.  We write out the overview of the week.  Then every morning we go through the schedule with our kids. 

Familiarity Breeds Calm

We pack familiar snacks. When we stay with family, we ask them to buy the same usual breakfast foods we eat at home. 

Practicing some family traditions at home is very important.   For example, we all sing Christmas carols on Christmas Eve.  So we pre-teach them a few songs so they feel prepared when we are with extended family. 

 -Stacy, (mom of 3- one with SPD) The Semi-Crunchy Mama

Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #8: Be Willing To Disappoint Adults

Tricia is on board with Stacy’s suggestion as well.  

We had to tell our family that we were only going to one event a day.  So that means:

  • my side on Christmas Eve.
  • his side Christmas Day
  • or vice versa.

And we only do one Thanksgiving and one Easter.   We tried for years to make everyone happy and go to 2 or 3 different events every holiday.  It was a nightmare and exhausting.   

Now, Christmas day is opening presents in our PJs, eating cinnamon rolls, and taking naps.  There are no expectations on Christmas day beyond that.

Tricia Asbra, MAT, special needs mom of 4, (one through adoption)

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Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #9: Leave Early

Know your family’s limits.  And don’t be afraid to leave early. 

Doing what’s best for your family is more important. 

The others aren’t the ones to be around dealing with the consequences, so their opinions don’t get to rule the day.

It’s hard getting made fun of or belittled by the adults in your life, but it’s still the better choice.

-Aryn The Libraryan, mom of 2, (one highly-sensitive), www.arynthelibraryan.com, Helping Bookish Christian Women one page at a time.  

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Kate agrees with Aryn.

Don’t be afraid to pick and choose what events or parties you attend.  Do what feels right for how you want to celebrate the holiday. 

And do what makes you most at peace with yourself and your family. 

Kate, Mom on one boy, 10 years old, adhd, highly sensitive & extremely smart

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How Do Special Needs Moms Avoid The Holiday Stress?

According to Kara, Hide.

She says she’s kidding, but she may be on to something. 

Here’s what this mom has to say about keeping the holiday stress to a minimum.

Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #10 : Build In Margin & Self-Regulation Strategies

We try to keep our routine as much as possible.  After we have an eventful day we build in down time.   I know my kids completely fall apart the day after a “big day”. 

We also make sure to walk through social skills and expectations ahead of time.  Not too far in advance.    

Discussing appropriate behavior and good choices to self manage is very important. For example,

“If you’re feeling overwhelmed you can…”,

Many adoptive families will understand Kara’s next comment.  She continues,

“And reminding them that there will be enough food, and more food later, to stave off panic.  It doesn’t always work, but we try.”

Sensory Regulation Tools In Their Toolbelt

One thing that Kara eluded to in her stress-free holiday tip, was the importance of equipping our kids with appropriate self-regulation tools.

In our home, this is a BIG one.  Instead of telling our kids what not to do, we best support them when we equip them.  One of the many sensory friendly self-regulation tools that we use in our home is our indoor trampoline.

These last tips are mine, Friend.

Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #11: Trampoline

No joke.  This trampoline has been a God-send for my 12 year old daughter.  She is both a vestibular and proprioceptive seeker, and uses the trampoline daily to help with self-regulation.

We bought this after moving into a neighborhood that didn’t allow outdoor trampolines.  Whah, whah… party-poopers.

In the end though, this was an awesome purchase.   I highly recommend the investment if you have a child who has an affinity for jumping, crashing, deep pressure, etc.

For more information about self-regulation, sensory strategies, and more, sign up for the Barely Surviving to Outright Thriving course.

holiday stress relief, special needs moms holiday hacks

Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #12: Shared Activities For Family

Every year I make sure to fill the table time with activities to engage the whole family.   I print out holiday printables like crazy.

  • Thanksgiving Word Searches,
  • Thankful-For Activities,
  • Christmas Make-a-Words,
  • And a variety of other activities

The main point is to engage the family in shared activities. And holiday printables are an easy way to bring family together.  We team up in pairs.  Grandparents, aunts, siblings, kids and friends.

This also helps conversation flow for our kids who struggle socially with conversation skills.. 

Follow me on Pinterest where I’ve pinned a ton of family holiday fun printables.  

Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #13: Invest In You 

I don’t know where you are in this season with your child.  You may be where I was a few years ago.

I was stressed, confused, and isolated navigating my son’s uncontrollable behaviors.  Everything I knew to do as a good Christian mom failed.  Nothing that worked with my older children worked with my son.  I felt like a failure and spent way too many holidays broken and miserable.

By God’s mercy, my family is in a radically different place.  We are thriving. Not perfect, but thriving.

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Barely Surviving To Outright Thriving

Here’s the thing.   I’ve learned more about God’s design of the brain (neuroscience) than I ever did in graduate school.  And, wow!  The Gospel so clearly demonstrates the importance of parenting our uniquely-wired kids differently.

That’s why I’ve spent more than a year creating a parenting course for moms who know there must be a better way. 

Barely Surviving to Outright Thriving is everything I wished I knew then.  My heart is to equip you to equip your child to thrive as exactly the person God intentionally created them to be.

Maybe this is the time to invest in you so that you can move the needle forward for your child.  Check it out today and find freedom and joy in your family again.

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Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #14: We Can Only Do Our Best

Whether your child struggles with sensory issues, anxiety, or simply needs the predictability of routine to self-regulate well, we can only do our best.  Don’t be afraid to say no to holiday commitments ever.  Make sure to give your family plenty of wiggle room as you schedule the months to come.

Always prioritize the best interest of your specific family and don’t worry about what anyone thinks.  Love YOUR family well in freedom.

RELATED POST: Growth Mindset For Moms Changes Everything

Special Needs Holiday Stress Tip #15: Trust God’s Decision

God chose YOU to parent your child on purpose.   He’s your audience of One.  Trust in His decision to choose you to parent your children.  Praying for you to be flooded with His peace and joy in even the chaos, Friend.

-Lindsay, (mom of three, 2 biological & 1 through adoption: ADHD, ASD, Anxiety & FASD), Founder, A Heart For All Students

What about you?  Do you have any hacks that may be useful to another momma?   Comment below.

Recommended Reading For Moms Raising Kids With ADHD, SPD, ASD (or No Acronym At All)

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Effectively Calm a Child During a Meltdown

Effectively Calm a Child During a Meltdown

How to Calm Your Child During a Meltdown

Do you know how to calm your child during a meltdown?  BTW… I am referring to your kid’s meltdown… not yours.  That’s another blog post.

If you have an adopted child, a child with cognitive differences, or if you’re just in a tougher season with your kiddo, the relevance of this question is even more profound.

Calming Our Kids’ Meltdowns Requires Calming Our Own 

Raising a higher-needs child can be exhausting.  

And the reality is that the way that our child’s cognitive differences show up on any given day can definitely impact the severity of our momma fatigue.  Right?

Our kids’ tantrums and meltdowns are exponentially magnified as we battle our own internal dialogue and unmet expectations.  For the mom in the trenches, finding a way to calm her child during a meltdown can feel impossible.

Help Calm A Child During Meltdown

My Own Hot Mess

Girl, I know this because I’ve lived it.  While in the thick of my son’s daily tantrums and meltdowns, I was a hot mess.  And while I would like to say that by using the word hot I’m refering to my physical appearance, let’s just say,

“Yeah, right.”

At that time, I considered the day a win if I was able to get a shower in and brush my teeth.  Please tell me you can relate.  Sadly, that was my reality.

Make It Stop, Please.

And while I often said this in jest as a way to try to make light of my desperation, deep down I just wanted to get away and hide.  Anywhere.

Just to MAKE.IT.STOP.

All of the parenting strategies I knew to use were absolutely useless.  I felt helpless, overwhelmed, and as if I was going crazy.  I had no idea how to calm my child during his meltdowns and rages.  Let alone calm my own.  Ouch.

Shifting Perspective On Discipline

Before adopting our son, I would never have believed my family would end up where we had in that brutal season.  In my “perfect parenting days,” I would have looked at me and my kid and thought,

‘That mom has zero control over her child.  She needs to get it together.’

At least that is what I would likely have believed deep down inside.  Once my son’s volatile behaviors began to display themselves at 18 months old, our family was completely rocked.

Me in particular?   Shattered.  To hear more, listen in to the interview with my friend, Wren Robbins.

A Mom Living In Constant Anxiety

All that I thought I knew about being a good Christian mom failed. 

In fact, each technique and strategy that once worked with my girls was useless and completely ineffective with my son. Everything I depended on to anchor my identity as a good Christian mom dissipated.  

As a result, confusion and anxiety became the driving force of my life.

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The Christian Parenting Books

In my earlier parenting years, I read every Christian parenting book I could get my hands on.  If one of my girls dared to have their version of a meltdown, I brought order quickly.  A firm voice or swift consequence and those perceived infractions were done (most of the time).

“Absolutely not.  Not appropriate.”

Those scathing words did the trick.  The girls acquieced and it was over.   And I was proud of this accomplishment.  Good Christian momma, right?  (Insert sarcasm.)

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Unhealthy Expectations

In hindsight, I can see that my perspective on parenting was pretty skewed from the beginning.  I was determined to parent my children the EXACT OPPOSITE way my parents had raised me.  (Sorry, Mom and Dad.  It took me too long to figure it out.)

In my home, there would be love, stability, consistency and discipline. Dang it!

God clearly had greater plans for our family than to be a behavior modification lab.  And so He delivered our baby boy into our home.  

Unregulated Child Led to Meltdowns

Once mobile, our son screamed and steamrolled his way through our home every second of the day.

  1. scaling walls,
  2. escaping the house,
  3. hitting,
  4. scratching,
  5. biting and
  6. throwing and smashing glasses, frames, dishes, etc…

Did I mention screaming?  Oh… not sleeping ever?!!    There wasn’t a single parenting strategy that helped calm him during his raging meltdowns.  Nothing I could do to gain any control.

RELATED Podcast Episode: Why We’ve Got To Parent Differently

Desperate To Stop The Meltdowns

Every I knew to do as a good Christian mom, as an educator, failed miserably.  Not one peaceful way to prevent him from getting into whatever it was he wanted to ingest or play with.

“No, Buddy.  You can’t eat batteries.”

Then it followed.  The sound that prededed that sudden burning sensation travelling across my face.

“WHACK!”

His frustration tolerance was non-existent.  The slightest resistance to his efforts resulted in aggression and rage.  Most often, it was towards me.

Suffering Leads to Good Even If It Sucks

We were living in a war zone, navigating grenades at every turn.  Despite being surrounded by a loving Christian community, I felt so alone.  Drowning in shame and isolation,  I believed that I was a failure as a parent.

I was devastated for my husband, my two daughters and for my boy.  His hourly meltdowns were too much for me, for the girls, and for him.

He was suffering just as much, but to most people, he looked like a “normal” little boy who was being a brat.  This couldn’t have been farther from the truth.

Shame, Marginalization of Way Too Many Kids & Families

Ultimately, my family lived in what felt like hell for years.  The term emotional anguish doesn’t do it justice.  And here is the thing:  My family wasn’t alone.

There are millions special needs families in our country living this life of chaos, fear and shame.  Whether through biology or through adoption, when kids don’t behave the world wants them to, entire families suffer.  Often alone.

Trauma.  It’s real and it’s pervasive.  FASD is real.   

And it needs to be ripped out of the shadows and exposed for what it is in the foster and adoption world.  (Again, another post.)

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The Need For True Self-Care

“Parents take way too much credit when their children are doing well. They take way too much credit when their children are doing poorly.”

Rather than checking myself into a mental institution for what promised to be a mini-vacation, I decided to make a different plan.  In order to prevent myself from setting the house on fire because I was about to lose it, I made an appointment for counseling.

Side note:  No one panic… I was never going to set my house on fire.  Hyperbole is a powerful literary technique.  That’s the way I roll.

Making the Call

One winter morning after a few hours of desperately trying to maintain some level of calm in the house, I hit a wall.  I was so overwhelmed,

  • with his screeching.
  • knowing my daughters were struggling in the chaos,
  • and with my own distress

I sent out a mass S.O.S. text to my tribe of girlfriends and asked for a Christian counselor referral.   Within an hour I had an appointment scheduled.  

Seeking help in the form of counseling was a game changer in my story as it is for so many women.

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Hell to Humble

God used that time of absolute hell to humble me.  It broke me in a million tiny pieces.  My prideful butt was so black and blue from the beating that my son’s behavior inflicted upon me.

In true form, God took those million pieces, gathered them up and delivered me into Christian counseling.  The late Dr. Karyn Purvis wrote in her book, The Connected Child,

When an adult is avoiding her own history, entangled in her past, or disorganized about her losses, she can’t accurately assess and respond to a harmed child’s reality. 

 

Meltdowns- Moms Have To Deal With The Root Of Their Own

Unquestionably, I had a lot of my own emotional garbage to weed through.

Apparently, I needed a major kick in the pants to make that initial call.  Needless to say, my astute counselor and I have done some serious work these past few years.  One of the many nuggets of truth she has offered to me has been this.

We as parents take way too much responsibility for the successes and failures of our children.

It took me awhile to chew and digest this, but it finally clicked.

Inability Saves My Family

My inability to control my son saved my entire family.  Ultimately, could I prevent my 3 year old from running into the street every single time he tried?   Nope.

We couldn’t prevent him from using a broom handle to unhook the chain locks to escape the house.  Try?  Yes.  Guarantee success?  No way.

Force him to sleep and to “obey right away?”   Yeah right.  

Moms, Kid Meltdowns & The Lie Of Control

I had zero control over him then and have zero control now.  In order to effectively parent my son, I had to completely shift my perspective on parenting and discipline.   

I had to wake up to the notion that my boy’s cognitive differences made his ability to self-regulate well a very difficult task.

A Secure Mom And Kid Meltdowns

A Complete Shift Led to Big Changes

Historically, I viewed childhood behaviors as do most in our culture: through the lens of all behavior is willful.  Once I recognized my son’s cognitive needs and differences, I was able to see his need to be taught how to behave in a way that he could process and recieve.

This allowed me to respond to his meltdowns not from a place of offense, but from a place of support.  Instead of freaking out and coming down hard on him, I could meet him where he was with grace.

Kid Behavior Doesn’t Define A Good Mom

So many women believe a huge lie.  It says that something is wrong with us if our kid doesn’t behave the way the world wants them to.  

We literally become offended by or surprised by our kids’ meltdowns and tantrums (especially when in public).

In the face of “bad” behavior, we become trapped by the urge to stop the behavior.  

Fear is a Liar

This is not good, Momma.  By parenting from this place of fear, we end up missing the real issue and the cycle often continues.

Dr. Purvis put it in her book, The Connected Child,

Only a secure mother can say, “Tell me what hurts, sweetheart,” and listen attentively and respectfully to the answer…. Only a secure mother can find the heart of the highest-risk child.

Scripture tells us that God seeks after the heart, right?

Dr. Purvis’s words may be hard to process, but I know from experience how true they are.  My own insecurities and fear made navigating my son’s meltdowns exponentially more difficult.

Perspective Shift Game Changer

We have seen HUGE changes in my son’s behavior since my shift in perspective.  From willful disobedience to not yet equipped.

Game changer.  Miraculous changes.  He is not perfect by any means.   No one is.  But we’ve seen huge gains in my son’s ability to calm himself when he feels out of control.  Even in the year since this blog post was first written, my boy has come so far and I am so grateful.

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Stop The Narrative of  “Inherently Bad”

My heart hurts for all of the kids who grow up believing that they are “inherently bad” because they can’t seem to get it together.

  • I’m never enough.
  • I’m always a disappointment.
  • What’s wrong with me?

Just think about how many adults we know that live in the dire wake of growing up believing themselves a disappointment.  

We all know someone.  And the truth is that that someone may just be us.

The Cycle of Meltdowns & Mental Health

That someone may be in the grocery store right now standing by in horror.  She is watching her child kick and scream because he wants candy.

She may be dripping with sweat and covered in shame as she navigates all the lies that tell her she is not enough.  I’ve been there.

Have you?  Are you there now?  Isn’t it enough already?

Special Needs Moms- Together

It’s ok to parent our kids differently, Sweet Momma.   We can do this together.   Let’s change the narrative for our…

  • higher-needs
  • highly-sensitive
  • neurodiverse
  • trauma-impacted
  • ADHD
  • Autistic
  • sensory sensitive kids.

Friend, I am convinced that all moms need a parenting growth mindset.  For the sake of our kids and our sanity, let’s be willing to at least examine it.

Disclosure: As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. If you do end up purchasing any of the recommended items through this link, I may receive a small commission at no cost to you. I appreciate your support.

Parenting & Discipline Strategy For Adults

Parenting & Discipline Strategy For Adults

The #1 Parenting and Discipline Strategy 

Every momma wants to know the #1 parenting and discipline strategy for her kids.

We all want that secret sauce to create the best kids.  You know what I am talking about.

Because we fiercely love our children, we moms desperately want to do this thing right.

So we search and search for the parenting and discipline strategy that will make our kids behave and turn into who we want them to be.

We have to, right?  I mean, really…

Who wants their kid to grow up to be a psychopath or self-centered narcissist?  

The world tells us that it is all up to us.  That raising a functioning adult (or at least avoiding the psychopath part) requires a specific parenting and discipline strategy.

 

The Elusive Perfect Parenting & Discipline Strategy

Good for you if you are the lucky mom who has found that secret sauce.

If your kid is one of the “good” ones who makes you look good wherever you go, this post is not for you.

Godspeed, Lucky Lady.

Now, if you are like me and so many other moms in this world, it’s time for us to get real.

Being a mom is a wonderful experience.  It grows us in so many ways.  But it is in no way easy or simple.

As I have learned the hard way, parenting requires adults to demonstrate the discipline and patience we desperately want to impart to our kids. 

That takes work and effort.  And a good look in the mirror.

 

Parenting & Disciplline Strategies

First Parenting Instinct: Reaction

When our children are “disobedient,” often our first instinct is to use our default parenting and discipline strategy.

If you were raised in a traditional household or the United States of America, your norm for parenting may tell you to put a stop to bad behavior ASAP.

This was certainly the case for me.  Maybe you can relate.

In the face of outward disobedience, you may offer a quick and stern warning.

“No, ma’am! You do not behave that way!”

And many times that approach to parenting children appears on the outside to work.

Our kids acquiesce in the face of fear and the negative behavior stops, at least momentarily.

But what about our kids who are wired-differently?

 

God looks at the heart.  1 Samuel 16:7

devotional bible study special needs moms

No Room For Mistakes

When my oldest, now 14, was little, any hint of disobedience was met with that firm approach that allowed no room for mistakes.

While I was a very loving, highly-engaged, and super fun mom, I was also parenting my kid from a place of fear.

I feared that if I did not approach outward disobedience swiftly, I would be opening the door to having “that” kid.

And that would be my fault.  I would be a bad mom.

And honestly, is that a surprise?

Outward behavior is generally seen as the be all end all within the church and our culture.  Regardless of whether or not we admit it…

For me, the message was loud and clear that the slightest crack of the bad behavior door was unacceptable.

The messages that tell us…

1. That our value as a mother is based on our kids’ behavior

She had better nip that behavior in the bud.

2. A good mom has a good kid.

 The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

3. A good kid behaves the way all the adults around them wants.

You need to give your Aunt Sally a hug regardless of how you feel.  It’s just polite.

I think I just threw up a bit.  Ugh.

Ultimate Goal?

But is the ultimate goal of our parenting to simply stop bad behavior in the moment?

I am not so sure anymore.

Friend, there is a problem with this “nip behavior in the bud” parenting and discipline mentality.

The problem lies when our pattern of parenting is based only on reaction to perceived misbehavior.  Without stopping to make sure our perception is correct.  When we get so caught up in our kids’ outward behavior that we fail to reach their hearts.

 

  • When we assume a child who is screaming bloody murder in the church foyer is just being a brat.
    • Except he is overwhelmed by all of the sounds, smells and fear of being left with strangers
  • When we judge that teen girl because she is dressed all in black covered in piercings and dark eyeliner
    • We fail to ask her about her broken heart over never being enough

God looks at the heart, right?

Rally Mission | Why I Started

Raising Kids to Be Adults

God willing, our kids are going to spend roughly 75-80% of their lives as adults.  So when we are looking for the most effective parenting and discipline strategies, we need to keep our end goal in mind.

Let’s set our kids up for a healthy future by teaching them that outward behavior is not the be all end all.

It’s their hearts that we must be after.

A child who feels loved, valued and connected to the adults around them feels safe to process through the heart issues that precede negative behaviors.

Let’s learn to seek relationship with our children regardless of what things look like on the outside.

As a believer in Jesus, I cannot strive for anything less than a relationship-based approach.  That is what the Gospel is all about.

In spite of our outward ugly behavior, God seeks us through relationship with His Son.  We are internally changed through relationship, not punishment.

 

The Greatest Discipline Strategy?  Mom’s Grace

The greatest parenting and discipline strategy is for the adults in this world.  We need to train ourselves to see behind the behavior and seek our kids’ hearts.

A mom willing to look beyond the parenting paradigm.  The mom willing to “look bad” in front of others who want her to “nip that behavior in the bud.”

You will know her.

She is the mom whose kid is screaming and melting down in the middle of the grocery store.

Instead of dripping with sweat worrying about what you think, she is offering her overwhelmed and exhausted child grace.

And when that momma hears an old lady saying something like,

“She had better get that kid under control,”

That momma could care less.

She knows the truth of humanity’s brokenness is covered in the grace of God through relationship with His Son.  Grace and truth.

Let’s go with God on this one, Friend.  For the sake of our kids, let’s go with God.

Disclosure: As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. If you do end up purchasing any of the recommended items through this link, I may receive a small commission at no cost to you. I appreciate your support.

Raising a Neurodiverse Kid (To Fail)?

Raising a Neurodiverse Kid (To Fail)?

Are You Raising a Neurodiverse Kid to Fail?

Are you one of the millions of moms raising a neurodiverse kid?   How about a child with ADHD, Autism, Sensory Issues or a learning disability?  Let me ask you this… Do you believe that our children are all unique?   
No.  Really.  Deep down inside, do you really believe it is ok for our kids to be different?  Why, then, do we as moms struggle so much when our children think and process the world differently?   

I am convinced that it is because we moms have been believing a lie, Friend.  

christian mom raising adhd kids

Lies We Believe When Raising a Neurodiverse Kid

There is this idea that tells us something is wrong with our kids if they don’t fit into the box of the world’s expectations.  And of course, for many of us, that idea then spirals into this one.
“I am a bad mom because my kid doesn’t fall in line.”
It gets worse.  There is another message out there that so many of us moms believe without ever questioning its validity.  You know the one I am talking about.
It rears its ugly head when traditional discipline and education don’t work with our child. 
Something must be wrong with my child.  

Ugh.  I cringe even thinking about this.

When our kids don’t fall in line, many of us default to a line of thinking often perpetuated in our culture.  Something is wrong with my my kids and I need to fix it.

And when we’re raising a neurodiverse kid, this can be extremely dangerous and destructive.  Listen to episode 29 for more support to move the needle forward with your child.  

Devotional Christian Special Needs Mom

What is neurodiversity?

Let’s back up a bit.

What is neurodiversity?

According to Understood.org, neurodiversity is:

Neurodiversity is a viewpoint that brain differences are normal, rather than deficits.

The idea of neurodiversity can have benefits for kids with learning and thinking differences.

This concept can help reduce stigma around learning and thinking differences.

Here is the deal.  We say we celebrate diversity in our country, but then we shame those who don’t fall in line.  The kids who

  • act differently,
  • say the “wrong” thing,
  • look differently because they wear the wrong clothes,
  • like the “wrong” things…

For the sake of our kids’ futures, this has got to stop.

christian mom raising adhd kids

Take God At His Word

Perhaps, our neurodiverse kids were never meant to “fall in line”?   If you are a Christian mom like me, you may struggle with this.

Many of us have been told by our church culture that behavior A, B, & C are appropriate.  Then we are told that Behaviors X, Y and Z are inappropriate.

The next message is loud and clear.  It’s our job to control our kids’ behaviors based on these rules.

But what happens when our kids do things differently?  When they don’t respond and fall in line?  We often panic and push harder with the same old parenting strategies that DO NOT work.

Devotional Christian Special Needs Mom

Neurodiverse Kids Need Moms To Think Differently

Maybe you are the momma who watches her child break down with anxiety when it’s “homework” time.  Or are you the mom who has been “kicked out” of playgroup because your child doesn’t know how to “behave” appropriately?  

Perhaps you are like so many other moms who wake at 2:00 am overwhelmed and gripped with fear.  You know your child is struggling but you don’t know what to do.  Your mind races as to what you can do to lift up and support your child well. 

Everything the “experts” tell you only causes angst, pain and broken relationship between you and your child.

Sensory Meltdowns Are Not Bad Behavior

Or you may be the mom who is late to church because your kid had a meltdown in the parking lot because the tag on her new pair of pants is driving her INSANE.  You try desperately to create cohesion in between your kids, but your one child screams bloody murder because his sister won’t stop singing. 

Your child is overwhelmed and needs you to stop and love them through it, but all eyes are on you telling you to nip that in the bud. 

Shame.  One of the most destructive tools of the enemy.

christian moms and teens

Are you over it?

You may be over listening to those who advise you to continue pushing, disciplining and punishing for “bad behavior.”

  • That you aren’t praying hard enough.
  • You are too lenient.
  • Your child is manipulating you and has to learn sometime.

Have these approaches been successful for you?  What about your child?

I can only imagine it is not going well.

Neurodiverse Kids Need Us to Believe in Them

What would happen if we moms came together and started to think outside-the-box for our uniquely-wired kids?

Imagine a tribe of moms supporting one another through the tough moments.

When our approach to our exhuasted and tantrumming kid is a co-regulating hug rather than the acceptable time-out, we’ve got each others’ backs.

Collectively we can fight against the unhealthy desire to people please.  And when the naysayers call us helicopter parents, we confidently hold our heads high knowing we’re doing the best we can to meet the needs of our own unique kids.

Together, we can embrace our kids’ unique-wiring and allow our kids to be who they are.  Moms sharing a vision of a bright and thriving future for each of our unique children.

Devotional Christian Special Needs Mom

Raising a Neurodiverse Kid: Change the Narrative

Let’s change the narrative for our outside-the-box thinkers.

For our kids with:

  • ADHD 
  • Autism 
  • Sensory Processing Issues
  • Learning Differences
  • Anxiety…

Or for the kids who may not have a diagnosis:

  • The child who says, “I don’t know” all the time…
  • Or the one who can’t stop moving, talking or is impulsive,
  • The kid whose room is always a mess,
  • Here is a BIG one… the child who won’t obey no matter what…

Is the traditional approach working?

It’s time for us moms to come together and change the narrative for our outside-the-box kids.  There is a better way.

I think we can.  In fact, I know we can because we are already doing it.  We would love to have you join us.

my kid hates writing, homeschool help

Raising Neurodiverse Kids Through A New Lens

When we shift our thinking, we then will be able to equip our kids with what they need.  We mommas can then give them the support, encouragement and tools they need to use those perceived weaknesses as the strengths that they really are.

No more kids growing up with self-worth that tells them they will never be good enough so why bother.  Every child has been blessed by God with gifts, passions and purpose.  Let’s begin to parent them this way, Mommas.

We are in this together equipping our uniquely-designed kids to thrive.

christian special needs mom bible study and parenting course

P.S Check out my friend Tina’s story

My dear friend, Tina, has been living out this momma growth mindset with her teen daughter.

Tina’s daughter was diagnosed with Selective Mutism, just one of many forms of childhood anxiety, at the age of 12.

Her daughter shares her story navigating the world of not being able to speak outside the safety of her home for years.  She offers 5 tips to support our anxious kids.

Note how she describes her mother’s role in supporting her.  Read more here.  

Be encouraged, Friend.  We’re in this together.  

Recommended Reading For Moms Raising Kids With ADHD, SPD, ASD (or No Acronym At All)

Disclosure: As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. If you do end up purchasing any of the recommended items through this link, I may receive a small commission at no cost to you. I appreciate your support.

The Ultimate Guide to Brain Breaks eBook
adoptive special needs christian mom book

Grab A Copy Of Behind the Behaviors!

For the weary Christian momma who doesn’t know what else to do.

I hear you. I’ve been there. I get it.  That is why I wrote this book.

Know this… God chose you on purpose to raise your uniquely-wired child.  

Grab a copy, be equipped & be encouraged.

Teen Mood Swings & Mom Mindset

Teen Mood Swings & Mom Mindset

Teen Mood Swings

Parents have been navigating teen mood swings since the creation of man.  Generations of moms have been plagued by the hormonal roller coaster of their teens’ meltdowns.  I’m no exception.

Many have heard me share about navigating my adopted son’s volatile behaviors.  

It was our family’s brutal journey with him that led me to a life completely shattered.  And then God rebuilding me into a completely different parent and teacher.

For more about our story through adoption and special needs, start here.

My tween and teen girls- Lots of teen mood swings

However, it is not only my son who needs support with his mood swings.

Like generations of girls before her, my oldest daughter eventually morphed into a young lady.  While she is generally a very respectful girl, she is still a teen.

Hormones come with the territory.  We adult women suffer from the occasional hormonal rage.

Mom mood swings are real.  Yikes!!  Am I right?

So understandably, my girl and her younger sister experience teen mood swings and meltdowns every once in awhile.

No big deal.  Right?

Disclosure: Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. If you do end up purchasing any of the recommended items through this link, I may receive a small commission at no cost to you which allows me to continue offering as much free content as possible. I appreciate your support.

Raising teen girls.  Parent & discipline strategies to deepen your relationship.

Mexican food and Moods

Let me share a story with you.   About a year ago, I took my girls out on a dinner date.  Of course, we all agreed on Mexican.  Who doesn’t love chips and salsa?

The date was supposed to be just my middle daughter and me.  However, at the last minute my oldest begged to join us.  Middle graciously agreed that Big Sis could tag along on our date night.

Fast forward about an hour.  We had enjoyed our chips, salsa, queso, nachos and a burrito.  (I have to clarify that we shared.  Just sayin.)

Lots of silly conversations.  It was a success…  Until…It wasn’t.

Teen Moodiness to Meltdowns in 30 Seconds Flat

In what seemed like a thirty second window of time, my oldest daughter shifted.  She was suddenly sucked into the cyclone of teen mood swings.

Her face changed… she was no longer laughing at my stories about how Aunty Jamie used to be obsessed with Davy Jones from The Monkees

Anyone else remember The Monkees on Nickelodeon after school?

“Hey, hey, we’re the Monkees!”

“Daydream believer and a homecoming queen…”

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Nobody cares?

Ok… apparently my cousins, my sisters and I had strange taste in entertainment.  We still had tons of fun growing up.

Back to the story.   My girls had been asking questions about my life as a kid and we were having fun and laughing.  So it took me off guard when my oldest suddenly shut down.

positive parenting teen girls, christian parenting, raising teen girls

Teen Attitude and Complaining 

We were chomping down on our chips and salsa when she began complaining about “being full” and wanting me to drive her home.  I asked her what was wrong.

Classic teen response,

“Nothing.”

Pushing her further, (I knew she wasn’t telling me the truth), she responded with,

“I’m just tired.”

Devotional Christian Special Needs Mom

Mom Mindset & Mood Swings

‘Oh! That’s how she is going to play it. Great!’

Frustration was beginning to creep up as the possibilities ran through my head.   My initial reaction was to become a little P.O.ed at her. 

See the shift?  I am just as guilty of my own meltdowns when things don’t go my way.   That’s for another post.

‘Great!  After she begged her little sister to jump in on our scheduled date night… she gets what she wanted.  She got her yummy Mexican food and now she is done with us.’

Let’s be real… teens do have a knack for being just a little ego-centric.  I couldn’t have been that off in my assessment of her new shift in attitude.  Right?

Disappointment started to rise up in me.  Deep down I feared that my daughter’s mood swing might possibly ruin her sister’s date night.  And we all know how desperately we mommas try to keep everyone happy.  For more on how to deal with sibling rivalry, listen to Episode 27.  

My Teen’s Moodiness Was No Excuse For Mine

As the adult I had to make a decision.  My initial impulse was to lay into her about ruining her little sister’s date time and being a bit selfish.

But I didn’t. Not this time.

In the past, I likely would have pointed out her self-centered motives, her attitude and mood swing.   My oldest errs on the side of taking too much responsibility for others’ reactions and responses.

Because of this, she would have likely shut down and apologized profusely before I finished even speaking.  Sadly, that typical response would have likely satisfied me at one point in time.

I mean, who doesn’t appreciate it when anyone takes responsibility for their actions?

Our Kids Shouldn’t Always Apologize

An apology would have been a satisfactory response.  Not always.

In this case, I could have slammed a door on our relationship.  Even if just temporarily.   Fortunately, this is not how the interaction went down. Praise God!

By God’s mercy, I have learned a lot over these past several years navigating my son.  God has taught me so much more than just how to handle a special needs kid meltdown.

I’ve learned how to navigate relational conflict.  Period.

Teen Mood Swings as Information

My daughter was having her own version of a meltdown.   I know what to do when one of my cubs has a meltdown.

No, it wasn’t a drop-down kicking and screaming meltdown that the whole restaurant was privy to.  However, it was my teenage daughter’s (lite) version.

Mom’s parenting growth mindset

So I made a mental pivot from the perspective that told me she was being willfully selfish.   My mind had to drop the deep-rooted belief that all outward behavior is willful and intentionally ugly.

Fortunately, my mindset shift opened my eyes to see so much more behind the behavior.  I thought to myself,

“Something just happened. She had a thought or something just came to mind and she is responding. Let me investigate.”

raising teen girls, tweens, christian parenting, mom

4 Steps to look Behind the Behavior: My Teen’s Meltdown

Enter in the Four Steps to Capture & Influence Your Child’s Heart, Beliefs & Behavior.

The reality is this.  After all the drama and the hell we went through with our son, God has allowed me to completely reframe my parenting.

Ultimately, this has impacted my response to outward behavior.  In my parenting course , Barely Surviving To Outright Thriving, I dive deeply into how to use the four steps.

It started with my son when he was throwing meltdowns and tantrums.  In that moment with my girl I realized that is exactly what I needed to do with her.  So, here goes.

christian moms and teens, trauma informed parenting

4 Steps To Discipline Teens Effectively

Step 1: Relationship

I looked directly at my girly and made eye contact.

Step 2: Provide Emotional Vocabulary & Reflect

“Hey, What happened, Sweet Girl?  You went from happy and laughing to ‘shut down’.  What are you thinking?  You look like you are feeling sad.”

Step 3: Provide Physical Input

I rocked her in my arms like a baby.  No.  That totally did not happen.

Step 4: Shift Attention & Distract

No.  Didn’t have to do this one either.

In a nutshell, I walked through steps 1 and 2.   I connected with her through relationship.  Then I offered her an emotional vocabulary and reflected back what I saw.  Suddenly, everything changed.

Devotional Christian Special Needs Mom

The Result

Her defensive wall of perceived teenage mood swing crumbled almost immediately.   My girl opened up to us.

“I just heard a song that reminded me of Grandma,”

She managed to confess as she held back tears.   Mom had passed suddenly about 9 months prior.  My girl had been struggling terribly with her grief.

Her sudden change of mood had nothing to do with selfishly “using” her sister and me for Mexican food.  My perception of her shift in attitude was actually sadness.

Traditional Parenting & Discipline Often Destroys

Had I engaged her through a more traditional lens,  I’d have blown it big time. 

The reality is that traditional forms of parenting (and edcuating) children tend to view “unacceptable” behaviors as problems to be eradicated.  Outward behavior is seen as the be all end all.  This sets up parents and educators to view success as the child who holds it together on the outside.

Had I approached her that way, I’d have missed out on an opportunity to be a safe place for my girl.  It could’ve been a lost opportunity to be her trusted ally who ultimately points her to Jesus.  

Praise the Lord that I didn’t jump to conclusions… at least that time.  (I’m a work in progress.)

Devotional Christian Special Needs Mom

Meltdowns Don’t Cease Simply Because We Age

The reality is that we all have meltdowns… ALL.OF.US.  Adults and children alike.  Adults lose it all the time.

Grown-up meltdowns simply “look” different from teen and toddler meltdowns.  Hopefully?  Maybe?   We moms blow it daily, right?

Have you snapped at your child or hubby because you have reached the end of your rope?  I know I do.  It’s called an adult temper tantrum.  There is no judgement in this.  We are all just human beings living in a broken world.

Meltdowns simply appear differently depending upon the variables. We will all have tantrums and mood swings until the day we die.  However, there is incredible grace for us all.

christian special needs mom bible study and parenting course

Barely Suriving? Here’s What To Do!

Whether a toddler tantrum, an elementary-age explosion, or a teen mood swing, we need to offer grace.  We moms can choose to equip our children to work through the thughts and feelings that lead to those tough behaviors.

Then we can watch them smile and say, “Thank you, Mom.”

Eventually.  Hopefully?  Be encouraged, Mom Friend.   Join the 5 Day Devotional For the Christian Momma.  Toddler to teen.  Learn about:

  • Executive Functioning
  • God’s Design of the Brain
  • How The Gospel Points Us To A Radically Different Approach To Parenting,
  • & More!

Or if you are exhausted by the daily stress of meltdowns, disobedience, and downright exhuastion, check out my new parenting course.   Barely Surviving to Outright Thriving, will equip you to experience freedom and joy in your family again.

christian special needs moms positive parenting course

Disclosure: As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. If you do end up purchasing any of the recommended items through this link, I may receive a small commission at no cost to you. I appreciate your support.

Equipping Our Kids – Identity in Christ

Equipping Our Kids – Identity in Christ

Our Identity In Christ

In my 15 years of experience in children’s ministry, I’ve noticed a pattern related to our identity in Christ.

As we share Jesus with children (and newer believers), we tend to use the same verbiage over and over again.  Some would use the term “Christianese” to describe the language used in Christian circles and in ministry.

Intentional Language

In the church, this language begins when our children are young. We start intentionally teaching preschool-age children using and repeating key phrases.  We choose specific truths from the Bible and repeatedly use those ideas to convey the message of the Gospel.

“Jesus is your friend forever.”

“God loves you so much.”

“When you are afraid, you can trust Jesus.”

As our children grow older, we may beef-up our language.

“Do all things through Christ Who strengthens you.”

“You are covered in Christ.”

“Know who you are in Christ.”

Truth of Scripture- Yes!

The key wording we use to express biblical ideas are wonderful and based on the Truth of Scripture.  However, I’ve observed a shortcoming in our efforts to grow our children (and often new adult believers) in the Truth of the Gospel.  The apostle Paul reminds the early church:

“I gave you milk, not solid food, for you were not yet ready for it.” 1 Corinthians 3:2

By the term “milk” Paul is describing the way in which he initially shared the gospel with the church.   Specifically, that when he first told this new church about the good news of Jesus, he approached them with what they could digest at the time. The milk he shared with them were the basic truths about Jesus.

An example of the milk we may share with children in our modern churches might be:

“Jesus is your friend forever.”

Reminding our preschoolers and younger children of this is such a great thing!  It meets our kids where they are and this is awesome!!   But… this is just the beginning.

Disclosure: As an Amazon Associate I receive a marginal commision on qualifying purchases.  Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. If you do end up purchasing any of the recommended items through this link, this allows me to continue offering as much free content as possible. I appreciate your support.

christian moms, parenting, identity in christ, special needs

Cornerstone Truth

The truth of God’s love for His people is expressed in these simple expressions that we share with young children.  These basic truths are the foundation of our faith.  Using this basic language with our children is the crucial foundation to a deeper understanding of the gospel.

Paul would not have used the term “milk” to describe the way he presented the Gospel during the infancy of the Corinthian church if it were not appropriate to do so.

However, the pattern that I have seen often in the church (and that includes me) is that we fail to move from “milk” of the Gospel to the “meat.” This lack of depth was glaringly obvious in my own home one evening a few years back.

He Uses All Things For the Good…

Our family was in a deep season of chaos, stress and growth.

My daughters had both entered the world of navigating their own friendships. That evening one of my girls was struggling with a hurt relationship and feelings of rejection. It was one of those moments in my momma journey that I’ll remember for a long time.

How I wished that I could “fix” it and take away her pain! That power was and is not mine. I comforted her as best I could but ultimately, I had to point her to Him.

What do we want our children to absorb?

Here’s the deal… our children are going to grow up receiving a multitude of ideas.  What do we want them to absorb? Do we want them to soak up the expectations of a world which tells them that to be valuable they need to:

  • Be a certain size,
  • Wear a specific brand of clothing,
  • Have the latest phone and
  • Avoid the uncool and unpopular in fear of being ostracized by their peers?

What do we want our kids to believe about themselves?

The Truth of Their Value

As Christian parents, we want them to know the beautiful truths of Scripture. Furthermore, don’t we want them to grow more deeply in their understanding of the truths we began teaching them when they were young?

So many of us say that we want our kids to know the love of Christ.    We fiercely want them to know what it means to be in relationship with Him.  However, as I realized in my own home that night, we are going to need to be intentional if we want to truly equip them.

“Who you are in Christ is what matters,” I told her.

“Remember who you are in Christ,” I would implore with both of my girls.

Behind closed doors, I desperately prayed for both of my girls to know how loved they are by God. Earnestly, I pleaded with God to allow my children to know their value because of Jesus. I begged Him to make their faith their own, to please give them the gift of knowing who they were because of Him.

Suddenly, it hit me.

  • Who am I in Christ?
  • What exactly does that mean?
  • Do I even know who I am in Christ, Lindsay?
  • How do I expect my children to cling to that truth of their Identity in Christ if I am not exactly sure myself?

I need to find the verses of Scripture that tell me more about my Identity in Christ.’ 

Did I Know My Identity in Christ?

I had been in church for almost three decades prior to that night.  In depth Bible Study, line-by-line inductive study, was my jam for years. I knew a lot of truth and a lot of the Bible.  In fact, I had chunks of Scripture memorized because my girls and I had made Scripture memory work part of our homeschool time.

Yet, when it came down to it, I really wasn’t clear of the specifics. Where did that idea come from? How could I equip my girls to know deeply that their identity is found in Jesus alone?

No longer were the illustrated picture story bibles going to do.  So… I did some digging with intention and created these Scripture printables.

identity in christ for kids printables

The Offensive Weapon

It was time to teach them to use God’s Word as the offensive weapon it has the power to be. They needed to guard their minds against the lies of this world.  It was time to equip them on a practical level, with the Sword of the Spirit.

On A Treasure Hunt

I created a personalized printable of the Scriptures for each of my children and framed and displayed them in their rooms. These reminders have been a source of strength for each of them as they navigate the world. Initially, I had them read aloud straight from the printable so as to embed the truth deep in their minds.

Repetition is an awesome and simple memory tool. To this day, when I sneak in their rooms to get one more snuggle before bed, I use it as a tool.  I pray the Scriptures out loud over them and now over my son.  Check out the Simple 6 Step Scripture Memory Plan here.  

Identity in Christ Scripture Download

Oh Friend, I am convinced that all of us need to know who we are in Christ. Often, we need encouragement and practical tools to help us remember.  This is ok.

There are incredible blessings that come from having our identity based on Christ and not on what the world says about us. However, it is almost impossible to recognize and live in that freedom if we don’t know what Scripture really says about it. Let’s equip our kids and ourselves to face this world with confidence because of Jesus.  We are in this together!

Sign up to access the free Identity In Christ printables.

  • Repeat them aloud at mealtimes
  • Insert your child’s name while praying with them at bed time.
  • Share them with one another in the car.
  • In the hard moments, refer back to those Scriptures… tease through them with your children.

Equip Your Children with The Truth in Fun

There is nothing like having fun times of connection with our children!!  So why not add Scripture Memory into the mix using this Simple 6 Step Scripture Memory Plan for Kids of All Ages!  This is the exact system I’ve used with my kids for years as part of our homeschool day.  

Whether you homeschool or not, this multisensory scripture memory plan is so easy to implement in just 5 minutes a day.  And it’s so much silly fun!  Click here to read on, Sweet Friend.  

scripture memory plan for kids

Disclosure: As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. If you do end up purchasing any of the recommended items through this link, I may receive a small commission at no cost to you. I appreciate your support.